The perfect yogi? Not me. And not you either. It's cool.

Namaste, friends! It's Jen here.

So happy that Landen asked me to contribute to this weekly blog! To be honest, I miss hitting you all with my monthly ramblings in the newsletter so this gives me a regular opportunity to share with you my current thoughts on yoga and life, which of course shift and change as my life and the world around me shifts and changes.

Last week, Landen discussed the common misconception that you already have to have lot of flexibility to even try yoga (you don't) and that if your first yoga class (or first 25 yoga classes) aren't "successful" by some mental measuring stick you're using, yoga isn't for you (not true). If you missed the post, please go check it out.

Today I wanted to talk to you about another misconception that I think all yoga students (and teachers), as well as prospective students have: that yogis are, well, perfect. And that to be a "real" yogi, you need to be oh-so-yogic.

Let me tell you a story. When I was in my twenties and living in Boston, I discovered ashtanga yoga and after about a year I was a dedicated student, doing three or four practices a week. One day, my sister Liz was in town for a visit, and I asked her if she wanted to take a class with me. She is younger than me and always in better physical shape so I assumed (correctly) that she'd be able to easily keep up with the sequences. Our instructor was one I'd had many times: a serene young woman with a thick crown of angel hair who spoke in a beautifully delicate voice. 

 After class I asked Liz how she liked it. Liz said, "I liked it, but …" She looked at me. "Do you think that teacher is like that all the time? Do you think if she got a parking ticket just now while she was teaching, and went to her car and found it, that she'd be like, 'ohhhhh, namasteee, a ticket, that's okayyyy."

 I laughed that day because I assumed, yes, she was probably like that. Wasn't she? She was the yoga instructor. Liz and I were the unevolved ones, obviously, and this woman clearly had it all together. I mean, right?

 Fast forward to years later, in my own (first) teacher training. I dropped out about 35 hours into the 200-hour training, and I told the trainer that life was getting in the way and too much was going on. But I really dropped out because I just KNEW that when I spoke to a class, I did not sound like that ashtanga teacher I used to have. I sounded like a nervous and loud Long Island girl. I sounded like me.

 Not like a "real" yogi, I thought. I was convinced no student would take me seriously unless and until I sounded like a "real yogi."

 Do you have a ideal of a "real" yogi? Is it your favorite teacher, a yogi you follow on Instagram, a yogi you watch on YouTube? Is it (likely) someone you have little to no resemblance to, in body and voice and practice? 

 I can guarantee you that the yogi you admire has yogis THEY admire. None of us has all the qualities we are so sure these mystical others have: the ability to never lose their temper, the ability to stand upside-down on one finger, the ability to chant like an angel in fluent Sanskrit, the ability to never pass gas gas in public, the ability to rise at 4 a.m. and meditate for two hours, the ability to eat nothing but kale and air and feel spiritually satisfied, the ability to forgive everyone even the worst transgressions.

 Listen. The point of doing yoga is NOT to achieve this nirvanic ideal. It's nonexistent.

I'm saying the point of doing yoga is to be your best YOU. The you-iest you there is. 

Practice yoga and watch your emotions rise. Watch your thoughts crash in. Watch your body wobble. Watch it all and be at peace with you. Be at peace with the fact that you get angry, that you like pizza a lot, that your hips never feel square in Warrior 1. 

Watch yourself come through and LOVE it. Your authentic self makes itself known in every yoga practice and THAT'S your ideal. Does that mean your temper might not need a little work? Of course not, but just work on it without an unattainable ideal tripping you up. Does that mean your self-esteem and insecurity might not need a little work? Again, of course not, but work on it while releasing that imaginary ideal of what a yogi should be.

 A yogi should be YOU. Not the other way around.

 If you find yourself stuck in unattainable-ideal thinking, that's okay. We all do. I have to work on this stuff every day. I'm not perfect and never will be, but I'm aware of my issues and I'm making an effort daily to be the best me. You can do this too. Go to the yoga mat and see what you discover. Write in your journal. Hang out with life- and love-affirming people. Go to therapy. Go to events that support expressing and enjoying your authenticity (like the "Self-Love: Mythbusters" workshop at Emerald next month!). 

 As you figured out, I did eventually return to teacher training and get my certification. And at first, when I taught, I tried to adopt a weird guru-ish yoga angel voice, but I sounded like a super weirdo so after a short while, I quit doing that. I just taught as me. And that's when I began to get regular students who resonated with yoga ... and with ME.

You don't need to be a yogi. You just need to be you.